A Rant on Practicality and Disbelief

Why do so many extremely talented musicians place higher importance on other things besides music in their lives? It's more "practical" they say. They're afraid of the future and are running their lives by the horror stories of unsuccessful musicians that they've heard. What do I say to them? That there are enough practical people in this world to build an elephant bridge to the moon and back! Don't fall for normality. When fear rules your life, you don't live. I have heard the same tales of woeful musicians, and have had the same "career advice" bestowed upon me by well-meaning family and friends. But it doesn't matter. I know what I want, and I'm going to get it. Do I know for sure that I can make it in the music industry? Heavens, no! Do I understand how I stack up against my competitors? Not entirely. Do I care? Not particularly. I have a lot to offer the world and am going to break the limits of practical. I will never achieve my goals if I allow people's doubts and the fear of potential failure to rule my life. I will not know my capacity for greatness until I pour my entire soul into my passion and work as hard as I can and then some. I have total faith in myself and my future accomplishments. Am I foolish? Some may believe so. But I disagree. I think they are the fools for disbelieving the power of true, deep desire.

The Road Doesn't Stay Smooth

When everything is going right, something inevitably decides to go wrong. It always does. This doesn't mean I'm thinking pessimistically, but its just a way of life. We don't learn unless we overcome tribulation. Unfortunately for me, this trial is in the form of a musically-induced injury in my right arm. It's quite annoying actually. I have only practiced (personally) for three hours this week, when normally that's how much I practice a day. I've only been playing viola for four years, and this is my second musically-induced injury. The last one was an excruciating and debilitating back injury (scheuerman's kyphosis) which caused me to not play fir eight months. Not only was it painful physically, difficult emotionally. My music career was flashing before my eyes during that time of my life. Now I'm buckling down, creating fabulous practice habits, progressing rapidly. I guess I needed some opposition. I'll conquer it, though. I've been reading up on musician injuries so I can fight this one, and prevent future ones.

When You Can No Longer Claim Proficiency at Something You Were Once Proficient

Music, while the bliss of my existence, sometimes pains me. It's always better than me. No matter how far I get or what I accomplish, there's always something I cannot do. For example, I've been putting my soul into viola work. But on the flip side, I've been ignoring my voice and vocal work, another talent at which I enjoy claiming proficiency. But there's something really heart-wrenching about the day you realize you probably should no long consider yourself proficient at something. And that day is today for me with singing.
I've been a great singer for as long as I can remember. As an older child I took lessons and even joined an acclaimed children's choir. Off and on during my pre-teen years I also took lessons. But alas, the more serious I became about viola, the less time I had to practice voice and to go to voice lessons, which lessons eventually dwindled into nonexistence. And so, I haven't had lessons for several years.
I still sing, though. Whenever I sing, my soul is lighter than it was starting out. Singing makes me so happy. So, it's no wonder how upsetting it is that I can no longer hit the notes I used to reach and do not have the same fluidity and grace in my voice. It makes me want to cry.
Fortunately for me, however, I've carved out time this summer for more voice lessons! I'm soooo excited! It's going to be great! Maybe after another few months of lessons I'll feel confident singing solos again. What a joy that will be!