The Road Doesn't Stay Smooth

When everything is going right, something inevitably decides to go wrong. It always does. This doesn't mean I'm thinking pessimistically, but its just a way of life. We don't learn unless we overcome tribulation. Unfortunately for me, this trial is in the form of a musically-induced injury in my right arm. It's quite annoying actually. I have only practiced (personally) for three hours this week, when normally that's how much I practice a day. I've only been playing viola for four years, and this is my second musically-induced injury. The last one was an excruciating and debilitating back injury (scheuerman's kyphosis) which caused me to not play fir eight months. Not only was it painful physically, difficult emotionally. My music career was flashing before my eyes during that time of my life. Now I'm buckling down, creating fabulous practice habits, progressing rapidly. I guess I needed some opposition. I'll conquer it, though. I've been reading up on musician injuries so I can fight this one, and prevent future ones.

And Then You Get Better

This past week I didn't practice at all because I didn't have time. Literally. Zero time. (Except I got the chance yesterday and snatched it). Basically I had four-hour rehearsals and performances every night at the high school which led to little sleep and no personal practice time for Whitney. It reeeeeally stressed me out. It surprised me how nervous and literally afraid I was because I wasn't practicing. Usually I practice 2-3 hours a day. I have to. Or else I won't get in, or be the top at Jacobs or Julliard.  I plan to up my practicing soon, as well.
Yesterday when I practiced I was taken aback at how good I was. I feel like I got better in the time I wasn't practicing. It was so weird. Or maybe I just didn't remember how good I was. But I felt like my tone quality was much better, a bit more in tune, maybe. It's hard to describe. Maybe it just sounded surer. In any case, it was wonderful to practice again!

And I'm Alive

There's something about performances and concerts that I just love. It can't be explained completely accurately. I think it's derived from being able to share with others the thing which I love most. Expressing emotions, present and past, through the music. Music is truly a wonder. A paradox of simplicity and complexity.
Today I had my first concert with a symphony I just joined. It was incredible! Sometimes in rehearsals or during performances, my brain takes a step back and I listen to the music with my heart. And I feel at home. I'm enveloped in the music- physically, mentally, and emotionally. That is when my soul soars and my spirit rejoices. All of my senses revel in the substance which energizes my being. And I'm alive.